Sunday, April 24, 2011

I was gone but now I am back on the band wagon!...My reflections of where I have been

I have to admit that I fell of the wagon of blogging, between school, work and commuting the rest of my life was spent either sleeping or reading with the occasional time slot for laundry and groceries.  So now that my finals are over and I decided with much trepidation and the fact that the courses I wanted to take were full that I am taking the summer semester off to regroup, and recoup some much needed rest and reflection.  To this point I have some things to catch up on and others to deal with so I look forward much to this ‘free’ time to do them!

What I have learnt in the short and at times what felt as long eight months is that I can and did push myself to lengths I never thought possible.  To me I have accomplished something despite the odds, doubts and obstacles put in front of me.  In some ways it has made me feel a lot stronger, but most of all humble and in awe of the good people I have surrounded myself with.  Granted your friends are not true blood family, but my good friends sure made me feel that not having the blood connection was a moot point as they were there for me, cheering me on through my ups and downs of my first two semesters back at university.  My endless gratitude goes out to them, in every and any capacity they played in keeping me focused and spirits high.

Now what I get to do during my down time, is going to be fun, which is something I know I need to incorporate back into my life and continue during school too as that was missing a bit.  I look forward to a few road trips and just being able to clear off my PVR which I feel very connected to (smile).  On an even personal note I have been putting to the side a few things I know I need to deal with.  I had to put them aside for me to get through my first year back to studies so this is my acknowledgement of that.  I have learnt that what I have been socialized to in familial unit is very different once I set out on my own, and reconciling the two to make it work for me and where I am at in my life has been a bit of a struggle.  I know now that what I was socialized to is a foundation and from there I can change and make my own rules, while doing my best to respect the institution of family.  Of course there are those who will not and do not like what I do with the rules, however this is my declaration; you will need to respect my choices in order to be a part of my world! 

I am the master of my own happiness and to that I do what makes me feel good and in my own time.  I have learnt that the little things I get from the interactions from family are what truly makes me happy.  For instance my sister (who is younger than me) actually sent me a bbm and wished her big sister a happy Easter.  To some it may be something one expects from a sibling, but to me it means even more, I did not expect it, I appreciate it more than I think I can even explain in this blog.  Truly it made my day J

So I end on this note, that I am back on the blogging band wagon and hope to share more of the evolution of me(EM).

Hasta Luego!

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